And that’s fine, okay? We can talk about it more, later. For now, just know that I’m glad I’m here, and can explore and talk about things. Okay?”“You sure?” he asked.“I’m sure.”“Well fuck me to tears,” he sighed.I slapped him on the shoulder.“That might be rushing things a bit, don’t you think?” I said.As I stood under the spray of the shower I put my hands on the wall to support me. I’d felt exhausted, but now that I was clean, I felt better. What I was thinking about were the simply astonishing things I’d said and done, recently. I knew those things had been said and done by me, but it seemed like it must have been some other girl, some stranger who came and pretended to be me.He was right. I was vulnerable. I was vulnerable to the concept that I could say and do things here that nobody else on the planet would allow me to get away with saying and doing. That freedom, the freedom Uncle Bob was giving me, was intoxicating in a way that lowered my inhibitions. It made me feel bullet. The final touch, a spray of perfume,before I exited the bathroom. It was in the throes of clipping a pair ofsilver crucifix earrings to my earlobes, that I entered our bedroom.Clad in a pastel pink satin bathrobe, with much enthusiasm, but littletalent, I sang the old Jimmy Soul song, "If you wanna be happy for therest of your life. Never make a pretty woman your wife." I tossed therobe onto the bed and began the gymnastic performance needed to squeezemy body into a corset. As usual, fiddling with all those hooks and eyesdrove me to distraction, but my waistline needed all the help it canget, and Spanx simply don't provide me with the same electric buzz as alacy black corset. The house was silent and empty, or at least I thoughtit was, and so I continued singing while hunting down my stockings."Shit!" The word escaped my gaping lips, fleeing beyond the velvet redlipstick, before I could lock my jaw. Swearing was a reflexive reaction,an autonomic response, to catching a glimpse of her.
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